I Went On A Rampage While Playing This Game

Despite how three of my reviews have been games from the Nintendo 64, I have been trying to review a wide range of videogames. I've started with my favorite, moved to a fun racing game, then to a recent shooter RPG and my previous post was a game for the iphone/ipod touch. Now it seems I've moved backwards while trying to move forward by reviewing another Nintendo classic. There is one stark difference between this game and all the others I've reviewed. That is to say, this game is terrible.

I don't buy games I think will be terrible. I read several reviews from many sites and if there seems to be a consensus on the poor quality of the game, I avoid it. I'm not going to buy a $50 to $60 game just to review it and I can usually foresee whether or not I'll enjoy the experience. When I traded in a game I loved, after having beat it, and decided to see what this game was like, I must have been about 13 years old - too young to realize the horrible mistake I was making. It's hard to believe that such a game as this was on the same console as Super Mario 64, Ocarina of Time, Goldeneye, Perfect Dark and countless other classics. There isn't much about this game that's enjoyable and nothing that's enjoyable for very long.

For those that do not know, Rampage: World Tour was originally an arcade game, costing a quarter per 20 minutes or so of play time. Much more reasonable than actually buying the game and playing it for hours. You can choose one of three characters (giant monsters): Lizzy the lizard, George the ape, and Ralph the wolf. Each have their own special ability which causes only slightly more destruction that their normal attacks. The point of this game is simple. Destroy. All. Buildings. That's it. No real story exists. Who are these humans-turned-monsters? Why are they destroying things? Why go around the globe instead of having a scorched-earth policy and just annihilate everything they come across? How do they even travel the globe? Should we even care? Sure, you go from city to city, getting some slight variation in background views and types of buildings, but each area is just a recycled version of the one before it. And, of course, there are some enemies who attack you, like helicopters and tanks, but they're few and easy to dispatch.

In order to make this "smash'em up" more interesting, there are items in the several buildings like dynamite, used to blow stuff up real good, and people to eat, which I think give you health, or maybe just points. It doesn't really matter. Points don't do anything and there is no sense of accomplishment after demolishing each town. The threat of death is little and the drive to go on is even smaller. Of course, this is not just a straight port to the home console; there is an new monster, once you reach a certain level in the game and are able to break him out of jail you see, added for diversity reasons, appealing to the handicapped. This new creation has only one eye and is able to take it out to roll on the ground to then detonate a little later. So in essence, you can sometimes play a blind monster. Congratulations, purple thing. You are handi-capable.

I don't remember the last time I played this game for more than an hour. Hell, I don't remember the last time I played this game and didn't feel disgusted or wish that I was actually in an arcade so I can move on to House of the Dead or... well, anything else, really.

I can't give this game a zero because I did have some fun with it for a short period of time. It is nice to not have to think about anything and just break stuff with no serious consequence and hardly any threat. I can also see many people enjoy this game because they think it's funny or perhaps they just enjoy breaking down buildings and eating people, I don't know. But, for my own time spent playing this game, I can say I understand why this was made and that it was not made for me.

1/5 Near Lowest Score! Terrible!